Title: Solar Anus Cinema

Also known as:

Year: 2009

Genre: Collection / Erotic / Art House

Language: English

Runtime: 81 min

Director: Usama Alshaibi

Writer: Usama Alshaibi, Kristie Alshaibi, and more


"Solar Anus Cinema" is a collection of perverse but artistic short films by filmmaker Usama Alshaibi.

Our thoughts:
After watching the three Cinéma Abattoir collection DVDs; "L'Èrotisme", "Incarnation" and "À Rebours", I found myself specifically interested in one of the filmmakers. His name is Usama Alshaibi, and he made two of the most interesting short films from those three DVDs, and it was the ones called "Convulsion Expulsion" and "Ass". Two perverse films that for some reason are too interesting for me to just shove the aside for being filth. I knew that I had to advance in his work, so I ordered his collection DVD the same night to please my own obsession in his work. Less than a week later I have the DVD in my hand, and with a brand new TV in my living room, I had to shove this disc into my DVD player as fast as possible.

I should also add something that I do in every collection DVD review, because I feel it's right to do so, that we usually don't review DVDs of short films as a whole, but rather that each film gets their own review. But this film, just like the Cinéma Abattoir DVDs, just have a feeling over it that these films belong together. It works too good this way, and it would be too hard to review each film as their own film. By now it sounds like I'm a hypocrite because I've said the same thing in four reviews, in a time period of about two weeks, but fuck you if you're annoyed.

"Traumata" is the first short, and it's just about two minutes long. It has a naked girl with lots of bruises and wounds all over her body. All she really does is stand in an empty room while the camera studies her wounded body. Mix that with strange background music filled with moaning, and parts being repeated and rewinded now and then. It's what Usama Alshaibi does best, a simple but fascinating film.

Next film is "Organ Molly", one that I wasn't too pleased with (in comparison to the other shorts). I might have enjoyed it more if it was shorter. The time span of 7 minutes didn't suit this one. Basicly it's like a home video where a man is filming his girl crawling and rolling around in her bed, but having it shown fast-forwarded with a delightful tune in the background. It often switches to a new scene where the girl has other clothes on her, and mind you that it often means less clothes too. The part I liked the most featured the girl playing around with a digital photo camera, I don't know why, but for some reason it interested me more when we saw dirty things through yet another screen, instead of the camera man just shooting her tits himself. This part could've been the entire film really. The final part of this one has the girl smudging her face against a window. But before she does that, she starts to bleed from her lip, so it has her smudging blood with her face. It looks kinda cool, but by now I was sort of bored with this one and just wanted to see the next one. The next one is...

... "Slaughtered Pigtails". A girl in pigtails is being chased by a man with a camera (we see from this point of view). As he gets her, he puts a plastic bag over her head (something we saw glimpses of already from start). She starts to bleed for some reason that I don't know, and then it's over. It doesn't sound like much, and it's not really very gruesome, but I thought it worked rather well. If only Usama would make that into a longer short. But I guess it would be very "August Underground"-ish then. Maybe if he makes a violent but still alot more erotic and artistic one? Hell yes, please do.

"Self-Contained" is the title of forth short film on this DVD, and it has a girl wrapped in plastic wrap. Of course, she's totally naked under this so we're just waiting for it to get ripped open, and that's exactly what happens. However, she's still in the plastic wrap, except that now her tits, stomach, nether region, and her bum is out. Yet another short, almost pointless film, with an appealing soundtrack, that for some reason is more interesting than it ever should be. I guess this is why I enjoy his work so much, he manages to give the littlest things a way to live. This one has a soundtrack that is filled of noises that plastic wrap can make if you tear it, pull it, scratch it, and so on.

My favorite of his was also on this DVD, "Convulsion Expulsion", and I could write some about it, but you're better off reading my original review which you can find here for a more unbiased opinion (when I originally saw it I wasn't a fan yet).

Next up is "Runaway", and it's a very colorful little thing that kept me wanting more. If you put a naked woman in a dark room, and you use a flashlight that you point toward her body to see her, and then make the light into different colors. Then you pretty much have what this film is. Obviously done in a more interesting way than that, but that's the best way to explain it. It has a kind of old and gritty look to it, and it has an excellent creepy score to it.

"Gash" is the next film, and I think this one could be put into a trilogy along with the shorts "Traumata" and "Patient" from this very same DVD. They all have the same style. Bruised/wounded women against an empty wall or in an empty couch, and that's pretty much what it is. This one is my favorite of the three, and the effects on the gash wound are actually really well done and I wouldn't be too surprised if it's real. Perhaps it was filmed after an operation? I really don't know, but I like it. This one is also the most perverse one, but that only adds to it becoming more interesting.

Now comes the short I mentioned above; "Patient". A black and white film with an asian-looking girl with bandages over her head rolls around close to naked in a couch. It looks like she's trying to find a good position to sleep in, but eventually she sits up and looks truely bothered, but with a smile on her face. I can't explain why I enjoy this one, but it might be because if you watch this DVD to begin with, you kinda have a weird taste already.

"Spoiled" was my least favorite of all the shorts, and I'm not worse than I can admit that I didn't like it at all. It has a girl with silly and colorful makeup and pigtails. She has a little bad with the text "Spoiled" written on it. In the bad is a bunch of candy, fruit, and other eatable things, that she continues to shove into her mouth in the most disgusting way. This could've worked better if she didn't look as stupid as she does, and if it was taken a bit more serious. I'm not one to bash comedic stuff in serious situations, but this was handled wrong. It's just disgusting, and not in a good way (is there a good way? Yes, of course).

Now to the most impressive of them all. It's called "The Amateurs". It's tied with "Convulsion Expulsion" as far as my favorite goes. It's done totally different than all of the other films I've seen from Usama Alshaibi. Rather than going the art house/surreal route with lots of strange views, colors, contrasts, sounds, it goes completely realistic. First of all, it has a runtime of 49 minutes instead of just being a 2-or-so long. The first part of the film is too silly for my liking, so if we ignore that one, it's highly impressive and well made. It starts out with a strange geeky guy and a woman who are about to audition for what they think is an artistic David Lynch-ish film, and for some reason the guy has a fish-fetish so they promise him there will be fish. I don't know, but this part seemed like a comedy, and not really that thought-through, and at first I was kinda let down with the film. After those two are thrown out, the people behind the camera talk some shit, and eventually it's over. Now we finally get to see the good stuff. Pretty much it's three amateur guys trying to make a porno movie, and people are there to film (or audition). For every person that's there to film, something comes up that will ruin the shoot. The first one is a girl who doesn't really talk and who seems very shy. As they start to slap and choke her (two things she seemed fine with), she eventually tells them to stop and starts crying. Next up is a girl who recently lost or hurt her eye, so she has a patch, and this makes the two guys go soft on her. They both feels sorry for her, and one of them even seems to fall in love with her. The director behind the camera gets mad and of course this never ends up the way they want since no one wants to do stuff with her. Things like these happen with plenty of different people. One gets a stomach pain, and they try to get her to shit on a plate. One hates colored people so she refuses to fuck one of the guys. And so on. It sounds like a comedy, and it is at times pretty funny, but I found it awful realistic and something about it was just twisted and made me feel uncomfortable at times. It was also frustrating to never get to see any porn, since things kept on going wrong. If you whipped your penis out at the beginning of this one, you can safely tuck it back in because you won't need it. I don't speak from personal experience, but trust me.

Overall, it's a great collection if you like Usama Alshaibi's style. The films are perverse, depraved and rude, but at the same time they are fascinating, beautiful, and very appealing. There is no doubt that this is a good buy for anyone who is still reading this review. I also enjoy watching Usama's wife Kristie Alshaibi act, and she does in many of the films here. They make a perfect team. She seems very comfortable with doing the scenes she does, even though they are the most strange ones in here. Now, buy this, and you'll either be bored out of your mind, or if you are like me, you'll be amazed for 81 minutes.

For more information about this guy, go to DanceHabibi.com.

Positive things:
- Usama and his wife make a great team.
- "Convulsion Expulsion" is just so bizarre. I can't stop being obsessed with it.
- Sex, lust and perversion goes hand-in-hand with art house films, and Usama Alshaibi is the master of it.
Negative things:
- "Spoiled" was a pretty bad one.
- Could've had more films like "The Amateurs". It's realism made it intriguing.

Gore: 0.5/5
Nudity: 3/5
Story: 3/5
Effects: 4/5
Comedy: 1/5

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